August update from newly arrived expat in the Philippines

So, here I am, sitting in the stifling heat of the Philippines, it is supposed to be “winter” aka the rainy season and I was expecting the temperature to have moderated somewhat, however it feels even warmer and more humid than before. Anyway, that’s my moan for the month, I have chosen to focus on the good and fun bits of living here rather than whinge on about piss poor driving etc. for a change.

I have been here for around 4 months now, and in that time I have been able to experience only a fraction of the delights available to someone as fortunate as myself with the ability and the financial backup to be able to travel around the archipelago of over 7000 islands, there is definitely a lot more to be seen and done over the next few years, I am looking forward to sharing with Kat and any kids we might have.

I have to confess that I have one major failing, that is getting confused about the price of some items, the main reason for this is that I habitually back calculate the cost locally into Sterling and then think about how relatively cheap, or in some cases expensive the item is.  I am not, however taking into account the difference in the overall standard and cost of basic living between the two nations: for example cars, mobile phones and many electrical goods are around the same price here and in the UK, which sounds great until you factor in the fact that average wages are different by a factor of at least 5 or more, meaning that the same item is significantly more expensive in the Philippines regardless of the actual price. Conversely flat panel TVs are not only more expensive here in real terms, but are also unlikely to be the latest model available in Europe or the US. This may be down to the economics of supply and demand which keep prices high.

That being said, I am still excited when I get something I consider to be a bargain for example Kat and I travelled back over to Tagatay the other week to celebrate her sister’s birthday, on the way home we purchased some pineapples, granted they weren’t the largest fruits I had ever seen, but they were something like PHP30 each, that is less than 50p back in the UK, for a fresh, locally grown tropical fruit!! Yeah, I know it shouldn’t surprise me, but it does and delights me too. And what was even better was that they were so tasty and juicy.

Over the months here, I have observed some ways of life and behaviors that interest me, some of which are described below:-

1. Cyclists and motor cyclists often ride with their jackets on back to front, I was perplexed by this for a while until I realised that it allowed them to avoid cold air and or rain penetrating through the zip, whilst allowing cool air to flow around their back, absolute genius when you think about it!
2. Pillion passengers can be seen holding open umbrellas, sometimes of awe inspiring proportions more suited to a pub garden than the back of a motor bike. These are used to either shelter from the unforgiving sun beating down, or to keep the biblical rain off, either way one strong gust of wind and it could end in tears.
3. In common with much of Asia, the motor bike is a staple mode of transport, the Guinness Book of Records would be impressed at the number of people that can fit on a 125cc Honda (or Suzuki, Yamaha etc.) even without the use of sidecars or extended seats and if you don’t believe me about the extra seats, check out habal-habal here.
4. From 3 above, you often see families on a motor bike, as the family grows there is more likelihood of a sidecar being added, but often smaller families will have Dad at the front, Mom at the back and the kids between, fortunately child size crash helmets are available (although not every child wears one). 
5. On hot days you often see men walking around with their t-shirts rolled up, exposing their abdomen, this I have found is an excellent way of keeping cool, but is not a good look on a pale, short, bald westerner with a beer belly....
6. This is one of the few places where you can still have your car refueled without leaving the driver’s seat, the pump attendants will even clean the windscreen and check the air in your tyres if you ask them to (some even offer without any prompting).
7. I was fascinated by people walking around drinking various soft drinks from a small plastic bag with a straw, again it took me some time to work out what was going on; it transpires that many of the small stores or Sari Sari shops sell soft drinks by the bottle, and if glass there is often a deposit on the bottle (much like there used to be back in the 60s and 70s in the UK) to ensure they don’t loose the deposit, rather than allowing the customer to take the bottle away, the contents are transferred to a bag and the bottle retained. This of course relies upon the integrity of the plastic bags, I am not sure I would trust those available in the UK with a drink or anything remotely liquid.
8. Security guards in most stores are fully tooled up, and by that I mean armed with 0.38, 0.45, 9mm pistols or 12 gauge shotguns; now I can understand this for banks and large shopping centres, but a book shop really?
9. The guards, however, perform what I would consider well beyond their main job function, directing traffic outside to the extent of assisting customers reverse out into traffic when leaving the establishment, which can be very helpful, picking up litter, collecting food trays in some food outlets and generally helping out.
10. On the subject of security guards, we were following an armoured truck as it exited the tollway a few weeks back, something like the one pictured here,
    
    this was plastered with the usual warning stickers, including “Driver has limited vision” and “No hand signals” so imagine my surprise when rather than using the pre-paid electronic tag lane, the driver pulled up to a manned toll booth and opened his door to lean out and pay the toll fee, now come on guys that can’t be right???

In the meantime, Kat and I are getting used to living together, we haven’t had any major upsets yet, although I guess I have skated a bit close to thin ice on a couple of occasions. 

• Kat has a paranoid fear of me going “commando” to such an extent that she has informed me that the thought of it makes her feel unwell, so you can only imagine the reception I got when she discovered that I had, indeed, been out with her one evening ‘sans culottes’ as it were; I of course was highly amused by her reaction and have teased her about doing it again, but this is being met with considerable resistance and I am being asked to promise not to do it again (I have to confess, it wasn’t that comfortable, so I probably wont anyway).
• Kat also has a phobia about dirty feet, not smelly feet (although she probably has that too) just feet with dirt on them. Now living here, I along with most of the population, tend to walk around all day in open shoes of some sort or another, flip-flops, sandals or similar. This means that my feet will collect some dust as I go around. Also our in common with many other bathrooms is what I would refer to as a wet room, i.e. it has a tiled floor with a drain and as such the floor is often damp, when I walk on the floor any dirt is washed off and shows up as a muddy footprint; Kat then insists that I have dirty feet and they need washing, something she is only too happy to help me with if she can tickle my feet at the same time.
• I have introduced Kat to a number of things based on my own experiences, these include proper roast potatoes, roast carrots and the like, which I can manage. Sadly I have also introduced her to other things, Jelly Belly jelly beans are the latest and she loves them, to such an extent that she sneaked some when she went downstairs the other night, but I caught her as I could taste them on her lips when she kissed me goodnight, when I hid the ones we had left after this, she went and bought some more from the kiosk in the mall. 
• It seems that Filipinos are dependent on regular consumption of rice, or at least Kat is. I am in charge of the cooking for the large part and therefore decide the menu from the food we have available at home, or go and shop for stuff. Recently we started on a diet which requires intermittent fasting, or at least drastically reduced calories on two days per week. Leading up to the two days, I had cooked chilli con carné served with a baked potato for dinner, we had the day of fasting where we mostly ate salad and lean ham for lunch and fish with stir fry for dinner. When I proposed a third day without rice there was almost a riot! Kat settled for bacon and fried bread for breakfast, but we had rice for lunch!!

Normal service will be resumed on the next post, where I am bound to have something to gripe about. In the meantime, I am looking forward to a possible long weekend away with Kat to relax, and maybe get some time on the beach or even diving done.